I feel a need to explain why he got me again. Thing is, if the Sniglet doesn’t feel like going to school, he says he’s sick. And if he’s sick, he also says he’s sick. In exactly the same way, same weak and pitiful voice, same mournful face, so I can’t tell whether he is or not. I just have to guess, based on past experience, and one past experience was that I didn’t believe him and sent him to kindergarten anyway, when he was about four, and then he threw up. I felt really bad about not believing him – that was back when he was Little Mr Sunshine, before he went all Scorpio on us – and I also felt bad for the teachers, because cleaning up barf is never fun. So now, whenever he
cries wolf says he’s ill, I think, “but what if it really is true this time?”
And you know, DrBob was sick last week. And I actually told Snig that I wasn’t buying it this time, but then Ignatz said “Uh, mama, I think you should believe him. I don’t feel so good either.” Now, when Ig says he “doesn’t feel so good,” what he means is “get a bucket.” So since DrBob had been sick, and Ig was now sick, it was sort of possible that for once the Sniglet was telling the truth. Wasn’t it? Half an hour later, Ig was horking his guts up, and Snig was asking for food. So I guess that’d be a no. No, he was not telling the truth this time, just like the last ten times.
His favorite ailment to claim is a headache, and when I talked to his teacher, she did mention that he gets a lot of headaches. So, you know, she believes him too. But he never gets them on weekends. And I’ve asked him if there’s something going on, some bullying or something that makes him not want to go to school, and he says no, there’s nothing. And I probably should take him to the doctor, but I kind of think these headaches are more likely to need a psychologist.
I feel bad, distrusting my own son like this, but he does this all the time: and then I call the school to tell them he’s not coming and as soon as that’s done he perks right up and wants food, can I make him some soup, and how about some tea, and can I bring his blankets down and make up a bed on the couch so he can watch cartoons, and bye! he’s going to a friend’s house…
Argh. All right. I am putting my foot DOWN. As of today, unless there’s a fever or actual vomit in evidence, he is going to school. They get barfing kids occasionally, I’m sure they know how to deal with it. And if he is really sick, not being believed will really suck, but hey. That’s what you get for telling lies.
Song du jour of the day: of course! Little Lies, by Fleetwood Mac! Hee hee.