Author Archives: alala

The last two weeks

I seem to remember that it made sense to go off the Citalopram because I was down to four pills or so and it’s kind of a nuisance to call the doctor and then go pick up the rx and get it filled every not-even-two-months, I mean if I’m supposed to keep taking them then why do I have to do this so often, and anyway I was really busy and also generally happy with life i.e. not depressed, so I didn’t need depression meds, right? And then everything kind of spun out of control and I found myself in that state I get in, where my brain is like a jar of angry bees and I can’t figure out what to do first so I just sit around helplessly and hate myself for not doing anything. And I used up all my social spoons (and may have gone into spoon-debt, actually) and spent last weekend in bed with a migraine that totally belied all of my “they’re not as bad lately!” and when I crawled blearily out of that hole last Monday, I finally made the connection between stopping the meds and… yeah. So that happened.

It still took me until Friday (yesterday? Guess so) to refill the prescription, so I’m on my way back. This past week was still busy and full, and this weekend I have been mostly an inert mass, but I’m working on it. And by “it” I mean… uh. Doing things. Today I did one thing. Tomorrow maybe I’ll do two!

Song du jour of the day: In a Week, by Hozier. And Karen Cowley.

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Someone should really have a talk with me.

Yesterday I went to Other Aldi in search of undies (because Usual Aldi didn’t have them in my size), and after I found them I wandered around the store for 45 minutes looking for other things to buy so they* wouldn’t think I was only there to buy undies. Then I saw how long the checkout lines were, so I put everything back and left the store without buying anything. 

Also yesterday, I wondered yet again why I never seem to have enough time to accomplish All the Things.

*(Who is they? The cashiers at a store you to to every couple months, max, and they couldn’t possibly remember or care who you are or what you buy?) Sigh. Yep, them.


This (actually not-that-)Old House

I really love drop caps. No idea why, just always have. And this one works for two paragraphs! Efficient!

don’t really know how this came about, maybe he’s planning on turfing us out soon, but our landlord, a very nice retired theology professor who now lives in Vienna, decided to re-do the gutters this fall. (“They really needed doing,” you will point out, noting the waterfall that inundates the balcony every time it rains. As a house-owner myself, I can tell you that that is true for at least five years before anything actually gets done. Hell, the house we bought in 2006 needed a new roof even then.) People came and put scaffolding up, which I am ignoring while Mr. Husband grouses. Apparently he doesn’t like watching people’s shins trudge past his window while he’s trying to work.

It’s been a month and a half, and the gutters are done, but the landlord thought that since the scaffolding was still up he might as well have the house re-painted too, why not. (That’s actually what made me think he wants to get rid of us. I’m not as offended by this as you might think. Ten rooms is too damn many and I am more than ready to move into something I can actually keep clean-ish. I know Robert won’t miss paying to heat this beast.)

Thing Two is indifferent to all of this. Fair enough, his room is in the roof, and the scaffolding doesn’t go up that high, so maybe it’s not bothering him, but a couple days ago we had some fairly strong winds and the scaffolding made all kinds of exciting noises, like a ship about to sink in a storm (I know this sound from moves, not from direct experience, I should probably add). I thought that would make an impression, but “What noise?” he said.
Me: Didn’t you hear all that groaning and creaking?
He: Yeah, but I thought it was you.

Now that’s thinking on your feet, kid. I was truly impressed. 

Song du jour of the day: Our House, by Madness. Not an accurate depiction of our actual house, but a kickin’ tune.


Cool things you learn

So I saw this video probably on Facebook because that’s where I see most things anyway this was a guy showing how to cut a pomegranate (and speaking Turkish! Which I was able to identify after only five weeks in my Turkish course yay me!)

And yesterday at Aldi they had pomegranates, so I had to buy one and try out this cool technique. I did it from memory rather than just watching the whole video, but it worked! Sort of. Well, not bad for a first try. 

And then I had to eat a whole pomegranate. 

I did get some pomegranate juice splitches* on my Turkish workbook, which I had up til then kept pristine for reasons I don’t actually understand. @Melanie: is this irony?

*Splitch: a very tiny splotch. It is too a word, I’m a linguist and I say so. 

Song du jour of the day: I looked for a pomegranate song, but didn’t find any I liked, so instead here’s Yuve Yuve Yu, by The HU. Not a big metal fan, even though it’s my sons’ favorite genre, but if more metal were like this, I’d be more into it. Wolf Totem’s pretty good too.


Whoo, that’s a lot of dust!

Haven’t been here for what, four years? But Jenny Lawson asked me to fire up the blog again, and you don’t say no to The Bloggess.

The reasons I fell out of blogging are various. The whole thing started as a sort of letter to my mother, living in another country, and the fact that I kept it going for like nine years after her death is actually pretty impressive, for me. But my kids grew up, and protecting their privacy became important. I had a severe bout of depression, with suicidal thoughts that I didn’t admit to anyone until… (counts on fingers) about three years after it ended. Made it hard to write. No, hard to publish. I wrote a lot, I just couldn’t share it because I thought it was all utter crap. (It may have been; I was in no state to judge.) I started grad school and felt that all of my writing should be directed toward that. Just… a lot of things. A lot of reasons.

Not a lot has changed in four years. Still in grad school, starting my 8th semester of a 4-semester program. Same husband, same house, same cat, very similar job. The boys are fine, that’s all I’ll say about them, probably. Song du jour of the day fans will be chagrined to note that my taste in music has not improved.

I’m not sure what I’ll write about, but I made some really great friends through my blog, and I still have some of them. The kids today have their let’s-plays and their make-up tutorials and Ryan Gosling not eating cereal. I’m a word nerd, so flinging words out into the universe seems like a thing I should do. Or at least a thing I would do.

Song du jour of the day: From Eden. Hozier.

 


BADHD? ADBHD? HABDAHAB?

I wonder if there is a syndrome or disorder or general affliction that is like ADHD, but with books. Did you ever drop some water on a hot griddle and watch it skitter around? This is my brain on books lately. I actually have a Word Doc called TBR (To Be Read) and it just keeps getting longer and longer while I read other stuff. My nightstand has like six books on it, all of which I am halfway through. There are more in the Room of Requirement, which we set up with loads of books and our old couch and now never use. I think it needs better lighting. Comfier chairs. Fewer dead houseflies. Seriously, why do they ALL go there to die?

But I digress. I was talking about books.

My Goodreads widget, there on the right, is hopelessly outdated. Every few months I get all virtuous and try to update it for my legions of fans and followers, but I can’t keep up with my butterfly reading habits and it takes me about five minutes of clicking around before I think “You know, I could be reading…”

So then I read. And then something else catches my eye and I have to DROP EVERYTHING and read that. Last week I scoured my shelves for a Barbara Hambly book because I recalled it having a particularly good description of depression. I didn’t find the book, but I did find its sequel, so I read that instead, just because. I also ordered the missing book from Amazon, because the collection must be complete. Then I went back to my regularly scheduled reading (Hugh Howey’s Wool, not liking it as much as I wanted to), but on Saturday I had 2 hours to kill between Zumba and Stitch n’ Bitch, so I went to the library. And I just happened to spot Ben Aaronovitch’s Rivers of London, which Brenda Dayne had recommended in an episode of Cast-On, and by the time I had to leave for Stitch n’ Bitch I’d made it to chapter 5. One of the other knitters saw it in my bag and said “Oh hey I have the sequels, wanna borrow them?” I made the flappy squee-hands. So that’s pending. Fortunately I won’t see her for two weeks and maybe I can get back to Wool – oh look what came in the mail today, it’s that book I ordered! I’ve read it maybe 10 times since I was a teenager, let’s make it a nice round 11. Then maybe I can get to that book I picked up in Switzerland, except it’s part 3 in a series so I need to reread part 1 (I’m halfway through – I started it the day we got back from holiday) and acquire part 2. I have a birthday coming up, and I’ve been hinting madly at my sons.

So yeah. I mean to write more, but I also mean to read more. And guess which is easier. Speaking of which, I can’t wait to find out what happens next in that book I’ve already read ten times. Later, y’all.

Song du jour of the day: Angel from Montgomery, by Bonnie Raitt. I should really get some new music, but the old stuff is so good.


all this stuff

I have lots more pictures and notes from the trip to France! I was going to cover one day of the trip per blogging-day for the next two weeks, but time keeps getting away from me. Not that I can really claim to be busy, it’s mostly Facebook and napping. Well, and cooking and cleaning. But I started a new job today! I could write about that! Tragically, I had to leave my job here in order to take this new one. It really did enjoy that job too, and I’ll miss my former co-workers, but there are rules about how many hours I can work on a certain type of contract, so something had to go. I work here now, and so far I really like it. (By “so far”, I mean that I have met my co-workers and I know where the staff fridge is and how to log in to the office email. I haven’t had any contact with actual students yet.)

Even better, I work right around the corner from DrBob now. Let the stalking begin!

Can’t blog about the kids, sorry. Something about privacy, blah blah whatever. I think I can say that Ignatz is in his final year of high school (proud mama!) but that’s it.

The cat gets her own entry. Stay tuned.

Song du jour of the day: Ooo, today YouTube reminded me that I really like Crossroad, by Tracy Chapman.