I know, I’m a horrible, ungrateful wretch, but oh, God. Does anyone else have in-laws like this? They have a damn fondue set, and Ignatz wanted to try fondue, so we asked if we could borrow it for Christmas dinner – one night out of the whole year, when they’d be at our house anyway, so we knew they wouldn’t be needing it themselves – and they bought us a new one. They did the same thing when we asked to borrow the extra coffee maker that they never use, and the little stand that you put a candle in to keep the teapot warm. Every time, they say theirs is not good enough for some reason (the tea-thing was too old-fashioned-looking to borrow for a few days – who freaking cares?), and we shouldn’t worry, because the new one didn’t cost very much. But (do I even need to explain this?) it’s not the money, it is the lovely lots of space in our beautiful house that they are gradually filling up with dust-collecting crap that we won’t hardly ever use.
Look. Every five or six households should have one fondue set, one chainsaw, one really big ladder, one car-trailer etc., that they all share, because no normal person needs any of those things very often. Why is this not obvious to everyone? We keep trying to explain that we don’t want a lot of stuff lying around, but we can see our words bounce right off their foreheads. Not sinking in. No idea why. Irritated.
And no, that wasn’t our Christmas present. They gave us something for Christmas. This was for Just-Because, as in “just because we don’t have any more space for pointless crap in our house, we’re going to start filling up yours.”
So now we have a fondue set. So now we have to eat lots and lots of fondue.
Song du jour of the day: Everything I Have Is Yours, by Billie Holiday.